Destating trauma – check
In shock – check
Depression – check
Dark pit of despair – check
Grasping hold for life – check
Climbing out of the mind fog – check
Amazing therapist – check
Devoted family – check
Unexpected support – check
Extreme effort to claw out of the pit – check
Increased good moments over bad – check
When there is no way that life can ever be what it was before, how does one rebuild? This “event” in my life has shown such an intense light in all of my life that there are no shadows for anything to hide within. I now know truths about things that I had no idea were falsehoods. It makes me want to run from everything and start all over again; somewhere new and fresh. My entire life imploded and now that I am digging out of the rubble, I am not sure what to do.
I have been reading a lot from Brene’ Brown and watching her YouTube videos; she is amazing. She is a researcher who has spent years studying shame and vulernabitily and through her research has found much wisdom. If you do not know of her work, I highly suggest you check her out ASAP. Bottom line, she concludes that all that is positive begins with loving our selves. Not an easy concept for most of us.
So in this intense need to rebuild, find meaning, start fresh, RUN, I am trying to turn my attention to the task of learning to love myself; to be kind to me; to give myself the chance to breathe. I am trying. It is not easy.
Where are you in your journey?